Beware the beam in your own eye - John of the Cross

As I ponder this metaphor about looking at others and judging them while not taking the same critical view of oneself, I find that I have a problem. I do look at others and view them with a very harsh eye. I have always been quick to judge and jump to conclusions. Why, I don't think that I have the answer. I could always blame my upbringing and environment, but that seems to be too easy. I could say that I have been uncomfortable and uneasy about how I am perceived by others, but that would be too harsh. I think that my true issue is that I have an inward air of superiority that has been fostered by my continuing self-doubt.

All of my life, I have tried to live up to images that I perceived others saw me as, but now realize that they didn't even think of me at all. It was my own inability to have self-assurance that caused me to become critical. It is easier to find fault with others, at the same time directing attention away from oneself, then it is to take an in depth look into one's own heart.

This seems harsh but it really isn't. I am not saying that I feel I have been a bad person or that there is something intrinsically wrong with me. What I am realizing is that I haven't always been honest with myself and have covered my lack of honesty with a veil of criticism for others. This veil has enabled me to hide and hopefully kept others from seeing through it and me, thus recognizing my insecurity.

J0hn speaks of humility as if it were a goal. It isn't a goal, but it is a way of life. One doesn't have to denigrate oneself in order to demonstrate how humble one is. In fact, this is not at all what John was trying to convey. Instead, one should be able to feel comfortable about oneself and this will be reflected in one's mannerisms and actions. There is no humility in using others to find self-assurance or worth. John wants us to take an honest look into our own soul's and find the true person that God has made us and wants us to be.